This is my last week in Peterbrough, this little place to hide, to work, to live a peaceful life, at times a boring life :-).
I have been longing for a change, for more time - time to dance, to sing, to spend with friends who seem to be away. And now, that change is coming, I must be honest to myself and say I feel unprepared. It's like a car you've been speeding up and once it's on the road, you don't know how to stop it, you don't know how to reduce the speed.
I love my little room, the friends I have made at work, unique people with whom I have shared such dear moments, challenging times, and good lessons to learn. When time comes for me to turn the page, I skim through it again and again and the more I go through it, the richer it seems to me. And, since I am a people person, their respect for me, their friendship, maybe even affection, become the most important thing. A thing that brings tears in my eyes, a thing that warms up my soul and makes me be stuck in a dear moment of which I need to let go of, but don't entirely feel like.
I need to get boxes to pack my books, my large number of shoes and ear rings, scarfs and paper. A lot of paper. It's amazing how many useful things, and an equal number of useless things we accumulate in life. Each time I move, I tidy up and decide to give away/throw away little parts of me that have now become unimportant.
I look at this picture of me and the Taj Mahal, a person staring at a wonder. It's a place I have seen, been there, travelled that road and never realised the greatness in front of me, the greatness of me being there. Great things are still to come, baby steps and giant steps, long roads to walk, mountains to climb. But this week, this place where I am, where I have spent almost 3 years of my life seems to be the dearest.
I don't know how things will turn out, and this uncertainty leaves space for anything in between. I fill this space with a great deal of respect for those whom I worked with, for the dear friends now scattered all over the world, for the ones with whom I'll do my best to keep in touch. I fill this space with melancholy, with nostalgia and with pride. I fill this space with enormous caring for my colleagues, for people whom I've helped and for the quality of my work.
